Coaching
with Judo
Redirecting the
Coachee’s Energy Toward the Goal
by Tony
Stoltzfus
Over
the last month or two, you’ve been coaching John toward his goal of rethinking
his work flow, time-management and getting more work done with less stress.
He’s been working diligently to make a change, but today he has something
completely different on his mind: a great new job opportunity. It’s an exciting
thing to talk through, and John is passionate about the opportunity. But your
concern as his coach is that you are two thirds of the way through making a
very important and needed change in John’s life, and suddenly he wants to jump
completely off the bandwagon. What do you do?
Two
choices immediately come to mind in this kind of coaching situation: either we
try to drag John back to focus on the original goal (when he really wants to
talk about something else), or we go with the flow and let the original goal
wither on the vine. Neither sounds very attractive (at least from a coaching
perspective!) But there’s a third way—what I sometimes call the judo approach
to coaching.
The Judo Approach
Take
heart: this is not about body slamming the coachee! Instead, looking at judo
and karate can give us a clue to this third way. A martial art like karate is
about striking your opponent. In essence, you are taking the initiative
(striking out) to impose your will upon the situation. It’s force against
force. In our coaching situation, a karate approach would be trying to redirect
John back to the original goal. We’d be imposing our own will on the situation—which
isn’t normally an appropriate coaching strategy.
The
other choice (going with the flow and letting go of the goal) is essentially
running away from the fight. Sometimes flight is a good thing, in life as well
as in coaching! However, in this situation, to back off completely means ceding
something important: allowing the client to lose focus on his goal.
Judo
differs from karate in that it is based on using the opponent’s own strength
against him. If your opponent tries to strike you, you redirect the energy of
his thrust to take control of the situation. For instance, you might step to
the side of a punch, and use the blow’s momentum to throw the person past you and
to the ground. Judo redirects the other person’s force and energy instead of
going force against force.
A
Judo approach to coaching this situation would start by evaluating: where is
the client’s force? Where is the momentum and motivation that are driving this
situation? And next would come the crucial question: how can we redirect that
force so it compliments and reinforces the pursuit of the client’s original
goal, instead of distracting our focus from it?
Making the Application
Here’s
how that might work in John’s situation. John’s momentum and motivation is
around the new job possibility. He’s passionate and focused about working
toward it. Our judo technique as a coach is to take that force and bend it back
around so we don’t lose focus on the original goal. So we may choose to go with
the job conversation for a while, asking questions like “Where will this
position take you? How will you make this decision?” Or “What is God saying to
you about it?” But eventually we’ll want to bend the conversation back to John’s
goal. Here are some examples of judo coaching questions you might use to do
that:
§
“You’ve
been working for a few months on time management issues. How is that effort
preparing you for a new position like this?”
§
“If
you knew you’d get this job, what would you want to continue doing with your
time management goal to fully prepare you to take it on?”
§
“Would
this position increase your responsibilities? If so, how do we need to keep
preparing you productivity-wise so you are ready to shoulder that burden?”
§
“Why
do you think the Lord has had you working on time management for the last
while? How do your efforts there connect with this new opportunity?”
In
all these questions, what we are doing is taking the energy and passion
connected with the potential job shift and bending it back to apply it to the
time management goal. If John can see a connection between the two, or see that
completing his work in this area is a key to engaging this new opportunity, he
will go back and attack that goal with renewed energy instead of letting it
languish. The beauty of this approach is that it honors both the new agenda the
client has brought to the table today and the previous agenda you were working
on together. As a coach, you leverage the client’s energy to work at both
instead of letting one fall by the wayside.
So
the three steps to the judo coaching approach are:
1. Become aware
of when the client brings a new passion or energy to the table
2. Identify it
clearly: what is most motivating to the client here? Where is the client’s
force?
3. Bend that
force around to integrate it with the rest of the client’s agenda, instead of
dropping the original goal.
Tony Stoltzfus is an author,
leadership coach and master coach trainer. More articles and materials from
Tony are available at his on-line bookstore, www.coach22.com
.